Wednesday, March 10, 2010

The drugs and the damage done....

Wow, I just read online that 80's teen actor Corey Haim passed away early this morning! I can't say that I'm shocked, given his history of hard core drug use...But damn. I'm really sad. I was a HUGE die hard fan of his when I was a kid. I remember having sleepovers, eating popcorn and watching The Lost Boys! Or Lucas! Silver Bullet! Dream A Little Dream!
My walls were covered with Corey Haim posters. It's a real tragedy that he chose such a dark and lonely path as he was truly a talented actor. I still think his movies rock.

I really think drug use is a horrible disease, which is obviously terminal in some people. I used to do my share of shit when I was in my teens and early twenties (along with everybody else) and I can understand that pull...It just sucks you in. Whispers nothing but lies in your ear about how beautiful and great you are, how everybody loves you and that everything will be okay now...Some people believe those lies and others smell the bullshit.
So why start in the first place?
Why did I? Because I was bored, wanted to fit in, be the rebel...I never did drugs to escape my "horrible" life, I did them to have fun. But there were times when it got scary...and it wasn't so much fun. You feel desperate...It gets old and your like, where'd everybody go?
I figured it out (at a still very young age thank the gods), drugs weren't my destiny. I could grow up and move on. They may have delayed my progress but hey, better late than never.

But my heart just breaks for those who get caught up and can't move on. I've known so many! They were smart and funny with so much to live for and they just threw it all away. Some are dead, or in jail, and some are forever lost in that cumbersome vortex of addiction.

I consider myself lucky because my dad is among the addicted crowd. But my heart doesn't break for him, as he was an enabler and would have been happy to see me be just like him.
I am lucky, because I had the inner sight to see that life is a gift, it's beautiful in many ways, you have to be strong to survive in this world, and you only get one shot at it so you might as well make it worth your while.

So the world is now short another young and talented person who had so much to give if only he had been a little stronger, and I'm sorry for it. But I also know that there is no peace of mind for an addict who can't quit, who is terminal. My hope is that Corey Haim and those who went before him who never found peace in life, have found peace in death.


Rest in peace guys...